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Can a libertarian curmudgeon survive in a post 9/11 America? Is it possible to create the perfect meal on a Baby Q grill? Will Elaine finally succumb to her innermost desires? Check out my novels - which I am excerpting to separate blogs as I write them. Just click on my Profile button to access their links.

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Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Sigh. Tiger, Tiger, Tiger

It appears that Elin has left Tiger. Now this does not need be permanent, but he is going to have to decide whether he wants a wife and family or a stable of mistresses; they are mutually exclusive.

Now I've heard rumors on the radio that one of the latest to claim "I did Tiger" wants money to not plaster her story - and maybe pictures - all over the press and net. What a mess.

But one thing confuses me is his plan to withdraw from golf. Why? It is not his golf that got him into trouble. No, that rests squarely on his ego and his wee willy. And if it takes more than a week to decide to get his ego and libido under control, he never will. I believe that golf will 'save' him, but nly if he rededicates himself to the game and not the 'perks'.

Tiger, here's a hint. Women are attracted to men who:

A: Look good.
B: Have a nice personality.
C: Are famous. Duh!
D: Are rich. Double-Duh!
E: Travel for work. (Mystery and convenience)
F: Hang out in bars near closing time.

You have to decide, up front, that you will not repond to any come-ons. It isn't that hard.

So the best thing to do is rent "Tin Cup" and "The Legend of Bagger Vance", get mildly druk while watching them, go to bed - ALONE - and get a good night's sleep. In the morning, if the rumors of someone wanting money to keep it out of the media, get preemptive. Publish a list of everyone you can remember, with apologies to those you forgot and an acknowledgement they can choose to notify you they want to be listed. Then you schedule a press conference explaining what you've done and why. You finish with a quote from Arthur Wellesley, Duke of Wellington, "Publish, and be damned!"


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